Up all night
The Clauser Stare (CS), a trademark move that was created when James and I were united in marriage and we have, consequently, passed this behavior on to our children. I do not recall the CS being passed down from older generations, as I don’t believe either of our parents were guilty of it, it is something that started right here- with us.
I am referring to the inappropriate way we all stand looking, for what seems like eternity, at something out of the ordinary. Mouths partly open, heads slightly tilted, and eyes fixed on this new and unusual site- All four of us, the same look. Two examples of the CS come to mind. The first is when our fence was being rebuilt; the baby (Emersyn) was asleep inside. The dogs needed to go out, and knowing that the fence was down we decided to leash our boxer puppy so she didn’t terrorize the neighbor’s yard. Out the door we walked, and then it happened- James, Addison (our 3 year old), Riley (our Boxer Puppy), and I all stopped and stared into the neighbor’s yard, with a look on our faces similar to one of an Amish teenager seeing a television for the first time. Our neighbor’s yard is not unlike any other yard- trees, a swing set, pretty normal- yet for some reason we insisted on staring- until one of us called out “CS” which broke the trance.
The second instance happened earlier this week, James, Addison, Emersyn and I stood staring at the aquarium until Addison said “Why is the fish swimming…like that…up,” we had a floater. Ok he wasn’t floating yet but he was at the weird stage right before a fish dies where they swim around like they have jet lag or have an inner ear infection, doing unusual flips, floats, and swimming directly into the glass. Addison still stood gazing at our acrobatic fish, and before I could utter the words “ask your dad why the fish is like that,” James had slipped out of the room. I love the way he wiggles away when uncomfortable questions come up- like when we saw a picture of our friend’s newborn baby boy and Addison pointed to his crotch and asked what “that” was- I looked to her dad for an explanation and he scurried out of the back door. Luckily, Addy is at an age where if you don’t answer her promptly she makes up her own answer and moves on- she decided “that” was a little tongue. Sounded good to me. I always thought I would be a mom who would be very straight forward with my kids, but looking at my three year old and uttering the word “penis” or “the fish is about to die” just isn’t what I want to do.
I was able to distract Addison with some blueberries which made her forget about Mr. Flippy Silver and his odd fishy ways. After putting the girls to bed later that night, I marched into the bedroom to tell my husband he needed to do something with that fish.
You see, James and I work for different companies but are both fortunate to get to work from home. Just me and James in the house together all day- it’s nice having a “co-worker” who is also my best friend- and while I thought I would hate having him here all day (cramping my style), it is actually kind of nice having someone else to collaborate with and vent to (not to mention I stay focused and diligently working- after all I have to show James how busy and important I am- I would hate for him to think my job is any easier than his). We’ve had this arrangement for almost a year. James’ desk is in the back room and mine is in the living room- about 14 feet from Mr. Flippy’s aquarium. James is having to go into the office this month, so, I knew he would not be home and I just knew that Silver Flip would go belly up in the middle of my work day and I wasn’t about to sit at home with a hauntingly strange dead fish fourteen feet away (and getting a dead fish out of the aquarium is out of the question- their eyes are always open so even though it may appear dead I fear it could come to life and flip out of the net and I simply can’t handle that).
I suggested that James take the fish with him to work that way when it peacefully swam towards the light- he could give it a proper burial. James didn’t go for that idea. Upon explaining that “I can’t work under these conditions ‘death’ really brings down office moral” he told me that I could put a complaint in the complaint box – all complaints will be “reviewed and considered” (he told me that once before, when I complained that it is always cold in my office…..he thinks he is really cute with this “complaint box” concept….I got him back though, I implemented an office-wide wellness program so now he has fresh squeezed vegetable juice in the mornings and daily work-outs on his breaks)….Luckily, flippy silver went peacefully in the night and James was able to give him a proper burial before the girls and I woke up in the morning.
When I noticed Flippy was gone, I text James and he confirmed Flippy Silver had seen the light- I mentioned to James that I wondered if Addison would notice Flippy was gone- and asked James what I should tell her if she asked where the fish had gone. My sweet husband always knows just the right things to say to use each situation in our lives as an opportunity to teach our children valuable lessons. I was sure he was going to say something like: tell her he went to be with Jesus and Memaw and Papa- but, nope, he surprised me when he said: “Tell Addison that the fish kept waking Daddy up at 2 AM, so Daddy took care of it….see if she gets the hint….”
Consider it done....(our 3 year old wakes up periodically during the night and we are working on getting her to stop waking us up when she wakes up)….when Addison comes home and does the Clauser Stare into the tank with one-less- fish and asks where the fish went, I will use this as an opportunity to once again, reiterate, the importance of NOT waking Mommy and Daddy during the night.
Thank you husband/dad of the year….and rest in peace Flippy Silver.
I am referring to the inappropriate way we all stand looking, for what seems like eternity, at something out of the ordinary. Mouths partly open, heads slightly tilted, and eyes fixed on this new and unusual site- All four of us, the same look. Two examples of the CS come to mind. The first is when our fence was being rebuilt; the baby (Emersyn) was asleep inside. The dogs needed to go out, and knowing that the fence was down we decided to leash our boxer puppy so she didn’t terrorize the neighbor’s yard. Out the door we walked, and then it happened- James, Addison (our 3 year old), Riley (our Boxer Puppy), and I all stopped and stared into the neighbor’s yard, with a look on our faces similar to one of an Amish teenager seeing a television for the first time. Our neighbor’s yard is not unlike any other yard- trees, a swing set, pretty normal- yet for some reason we insisted on staring- until one of us called out “CS” which broke the trance.
The second instance happened earlier this week, James, Addison, Emersyn and I stood staring at the aquarium until Addison said “Why is the fish swimming…like that…up,” we had a floater. Ok he wasn’t floating yet but he was at the weird stage right before a fish dies where they swim around like they have jet lag or have an inner ear infection, doing unusual flips, floats, and swimming directly into the glass. Addison still stood gazing at our acrobatic fish, and before I could utter the words “ask your dad why the fish is like that,” James had slipped out of the room. I love the way he wiggles away when uncomfortable questions come up- like when we saw a picture of our friend’s newborn baby boy and Addison pointed to his crotch and asked what “that” was- I looked to her dad for an explanation and he scurried out of the back door. Luckily, Addy is at an age where if you don’t answer her promptly she makes up her own answer and moves on- she decided “that” was a little tongue. Sounded good to me. I always thought I would be a mom who would be very straight forward with my kids, but looking at my three year old and uttering the word “penis” or “the fish is about to die” just isn’t what I want to do.
I was able to distract Addison with some blueberries which made her forget about Mr. Flippy Silver and his odd fishy ways. After putting the girls to bed later that night, I marched into the bedroom to tell my husband he needed to do something with that fish.
You see, James and I work for different companies but are both fortunate to get to work from home. Just me and James in the house together all day- it’s nice having a “co-worker” who is also my best friend- and while I thought I would hate having him here all day (cramping my style), it is actually kind of nice having someone else to collaborate with and vent to (not to mention I stay focused and diligently working- after all I have to show James how busy and important I am- I would hate for him to think my job is any easier than his). We’ve had this arrangement for almost a year. James’ desk is in the back room and mine is in the living room- about 14 feet from Mr. Flippy’s aquarium. James is having to go into the office this month, so, I knew he would not be home and I just knew that Silver Flip would go belly up in the middle of my work day and I wasn’t about to sit at home with a hauntingly strange dead fish fourteen feet away (and getting a dead fish out of the aquarium is out of the question- their eyes are always open so even though it may appear dead I fear it could come to life and flip out of the net and I simply can’t handle that).
I suggested that James take the fish with him to work that way when it peacefully swam towards the light- he could give it a proper burial. James didn’t go for that idea. Upon explaining that “I can’t work under these conditions ‘death’ really brings down office moral” he told me that I could put a complaint in the complaint box – all complaints will be “reviewed and considered” (he told me that once before, when I complained that it is always cold in my office…..he thinks he is really cute with this “complaint box” concept….I got him back though, I implemented an office-wide wellness program so now he has fresh squeezed vegetable juice in the mornings and daily work-outs on his breaks)….Luckily, flippy silver went peacefully in the night and James was able to give him a proper burial before the girls and I woke up in the morning.
When I noticed Flippy was gone, I text James and he confirmed Flippy Silver had seen the light- I mentioned to James that I wondered if Addison would notice Flippy was gone- and asked James what I should tell her if she asked where the fish had gone. My sweet husband always knows just the right things to say to use each situation in our lives as an opportunity to teach our children valuable lessons. I was sure he was going to say something like: tell her he went to be with Jesus and Memaw and Papa- but, nope, he surprised me when he said: “Tell Addison that the fish kept waking Daddy up at 2 AM, so Daddy took care of it….see if she gets the hint….”
Consider it done....(our 3 year old wakes up periodically during the night and we are working on getting her to stop waking us up when she wakes up)….when Addison comes home and does the Clauser Stare into the tank with one-less- fish and asks where the fish went, I will use this as an opportunity to once again, reiterate, the importance of NOT waking Mommy and Daddy during the night.
Thank you husband/dad of the year….and rest in peace Flippy Silver.
Comments
Post a Comment